Whenever I look back, I see the zigzag road of twists and turns, of ups and downs, my once proud heart has been through. I was a decorated student. My dad won’t walk with me in graduation ceremonies without a medal. His standard has been my fire. To excel. To be the best. To aim higher.
Whenever I look back, I realize those golden necklaces did nothing but bloat my ego and tire my soul. After college, they became more like a baggage than an honour. I was a Cum Laude (with honors) who can’t land a job for almost a year. A bright student who can’t pass her (many) final interviews.
Whenever I look back, I remember how His hands so holy carefully crack my pride and douse my smoke of arrogance. I remember the pain as my narcissistic temple crumble. I remember how with bowed neck, medals removed, feet blistered, heart surrendered, I learned His goodness and grace as I waited for Him to transform me into a humble, pure gem.
Calloused rock battered,
crushed, melted with brutal flame.
Gold birthed in waiting.
Oh love, this is so beautiful.
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So are you, love. Wishing all the best for you on your special daaaay!
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Aww thank you. I adore you and I’m damn lucky to have you. 😊
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awww. hugs. hugs.
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waiting, relentless, throughout, leading to great alchemy.
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Aha. Alchemy is the word. Thank you so much!
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🙂 you are welcome. great poem!
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thank you so much! 🙂
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Powerful piece.cant decide if it’s all story, or if some is autobiographical. I’m sure a bit if both. Sometimes the best stories are. Wonderfully written. Succinct event though it’s a poem. That contrast is very interesting fora Haibun.
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Your comments are also so thoughtfully written, dear Mandi! Im suuuuper grateful to you. And yes, this is totally non-fiction. 🙂
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Good to know. I’m glad you liked the comment. Sometimes I read a piece and I just have to respond. Yours was very evocative that way. Thanks Rosema. Have a wonderful Wednesday 😉
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awww. you never fail to make my writing heart bigger, Mandi! thank you so much! Have a suuuper nice week!
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your haiku was like fire on the soul Rosema, and like gold your soul is renewed from that fire. a very strong haibun that impresses on the mind the tough journey we go through in life.
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Waiting has been God’s way of moulding my rough self, so this poem just leaked after I saw the prompt. I appreciate you, dear Gina!
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it leaked out from all the right places, the cracks that our Heavenly Father has filled with much love.
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amen to that, Gina! looking forward to seeing you soonest!
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Yes! Take care dearie
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you, too, dear!
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Wow. That was a powerful read! I am reminded of how gold is purified when it is heated and the dross can then be skimmed off the top. It is the flame/heat that creates this purity.
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Yes, indeed. It is a painful process (i guess) but totally worth it. 🙂 it is my delight that you read my piece!
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I love this Rosma. Truly wonderful. I know how it is.
It’s been so long. How are you doing?
Blessings and love.
🙂 ❤
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Oh, hello Staci!!! My heart smiles to see you again here! Ive been busy but good. How are things on your side of the world? I hope all is working well! God bless you!
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Awwww, you’re so sweet. It’s great to read your blog again. Things are going wee. Very busy. Making a big move to Canada in March. Phew 😅
Have a wonderful day sweetie
😁💖
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awwwww. yesss for Canada! may our good Lord bless youuu!
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And may he abundantly bless you too.
❤
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thank you so much!
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😘
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So powerful and beautiful at the same time! 💙
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Yay!!! You are ever kind, Diana! Thank youuuu!
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My pleasure! 💙😄
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hugs hugs!
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💙💙
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Standing ovation. This is just pure art. Art that bled the experience of a soul who decided to bare itself. I am stunned reading this. Three times. So brutally honest. So magical. As I read this yet one more time, I realize how both of our lives have been so so similar, growing up, in two different countries and cultures. Maybe that’s why, our paths crossed, and this humble gem that you have become, lent its shine to mine, deciding to become one with me. (Claps. Wipes tears of joy)
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Uhhhhhhhhh. It is your turn to wet my eyes na. Perhaps it is why, my love. God has shaped us both and made us the better versions of ourselves before we met and become one. I am grateful for your existence. For your words. And I am most thankful to Him who gave you to me. (Kisses. Wipes tears of joy. )
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This is so beautifully powerful!
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Thank you so much, Angela!
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My pleasure!
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❤ ❤ ❤
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Oh this is fantastic, Rosema. And quite relatable too. I think there are many of us who were great students and achieved all sorts of honors and awards in school, only to realize it was a lot harder to succeed in the real world. But it seems you found your way, my dear friend, because you are doing wonderfully! 🙂
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It is one tough journey to be in but I would not trade it for anything. Each struggle was required to be who I am today. 🙂 Cheers for you, too, dearie! ❤
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A humble, pure gem….Thank you for the personal share. I had my share of humbling experiences too and I have survived to be a better, and more patient person. Love your haiku of: Gold birthed in waiting. Thank you for the lovely share.
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Yes for the patient person. Those tough times really teach us a lesson, or two, which we’ll never forget. Thank you so much, Grace!
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I like the final phrase – birthed in waiting so much – because of course that’s how stone and mineral are formed- through long eons of slow pressure, which could be a definition of waiting, I suppose. Anyway an extremely apt haiku. Fit the prose perfectly.
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Thank you so much, Ms. Christine! I am delighted with the details you shared on how minerals are formed. We are indeed gems that take time to be honed and molded. 🙂
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The last line really resonated with me. “Gold birthed in waiting” – success isn’t all about doing or getting but Being. Beautiful write!
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Yes, indeed! not the destination but the journey! thank you so much!
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I like how you associated bloating one’s ego with tiring one’s soul.
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yes. that’s how it felt. Appreciate your presence here, Frank!
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Part of me think it’s a pity you have to learn the world this way… part of me believes that man would not have been forced to humble yourself… another part think it’s a lesson for life.
I watched a playreading yesterday that made me think of your story…
It’s called “What we’re up against”…
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“What we’re up against” That’s a very good title and the depth of its story, i cannot fathom. i am humbled that you remembered this after reading this haibun. perhaps this life is composed of many wars we are destined to win and lose. 🙂
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Beautiful …and i am in awe of your resilience..you have been humble too accepting your shortcomings…and yes, graduating Cum Laude is not even a guarantee of landing a decent paying job after college..that’s the problem in back home..we set academic standards so high that even top 10 board passer cannot also get a job…
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ugh. it is really too hard to love our country but perhaps that’s how we learn patience and resilience. thank you so so so much, Mich!
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I am late to get around reading the haibuns Rosema, but I really like the honesty in what you’ve written. They love us and mean well, but we eventually find our own path, sometimes not the one our parents saw for us….
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i cannot agree more, Rob. life has a way of showing us the way. thank you so much and it is better late than never!
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Ah, beautiful and inspiring.
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thank you so much, Imelda!
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This was beautiful. Made me wonder how much of it was real
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all of it is real, Andrew. 🙂 It’s the story of my life. 🙂
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Oh wow, Rosey–I’m hushed.
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oh sissy???? thank you so so much!
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You are so so welcome!!! 🙂 ❤ (Yep, I moved again…sigh 🙂 )
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and i always remember how moving makes you happy. because it feels like you’re re-decorating a new house. ❤
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hahaha, I’m glad you remember it that way! 🙂
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yes! i hope you still feel the same about starting anew, sissy? 🙂
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Not so much…hard year, 2018.
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awwww. sending prayers and hugs your way, sissy. may God give a 2019 wrapped with more blessings, health, and grace. ❤
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Oh wow, thanks for the lovely prayer, Sister ❤
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Always, sissy!
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Thanks Rosema. I hope it goes well too 🙂
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me, too! 😀 😀 😀
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