To the man I once sang “If You’re Not the One”: A Personal Letter

To the man I once sang “If You’re Not the One”,

More than six years ago, beneath the hot summer sun, in front of our church mates and childhood friends, with the old yet still working videoke, I entered a song and sang it for you– If You’re Not the One by Daniel Bedingfield.

It’s the song of my heart. The song of my heart for you on that very moment.

We are not even together then, but my heart hopes it is you who I will have for my life. I don’t believe in forever. But I believe in every waking day with you.

I wish to grow old with you. I hope to marry you. I pray it’s you, no one else.

Fast forward six years and all that we have been through. There are great days. Days when I love you more than the word love can carry and define. Then there are bad days. Days when I am too tired choosing to love, to understand.

Now, there are more bad days than good days. Mostly, we’re just okay. Not happy. Not sad either. Just okay.

For how many times have we been on the brink of ending. Like we’re both on the edge of a cliff, barely hanging, barely breathing, barely loving, ‘cause our love is undeniably dwindling.

There’s a throbbing ache as I wrote this. A feeling of a stubborn stone stocked inside my throat. But then, for all it’s worth, I am grateful. For what we had, what we still have, and for what we will lose.

Love, I have learned is more than a feeling. It is a phenomenon. A ceaseless journey. An experience filled with cheesy cloud nines and hurtful hells.

I have learned, experienced and basked in this strange sea with you. I don’t regret any bit of it. I now know, you are not the one, but you loved me at my worst and I loved you at your worst. That’s the essence of the love we had, we still have, and we don’t have anymore.

For me, that is more than enough.

With love,
Rosema

11.05.2016
©2016 Rosemawrites@A Reading Writer. All Rights Reserved.
Photo credit: Unsplash

P.S. Yeah. Each word is from my heart. ❤

In response to Monday Morning Melts #1: Daniel Bedingfield – If You’re Not The One. A prompt I am co-hosting with my dear friend Jade! ❤

mmm-3

Here are the 4  easy steps:
  1. Create and share a post inspired by the song-lyrics-prompt for the week. A post can be anything: a poem, a fiction, a six-word tale, or even a photo. Whatever inspires your muse.
  2. Linkback/create a pingback to this post. Here is a quick tutorial on how to do it.
  3. Tag your post with MondayMorningMelts, so we and  your co-bloggers will be able to read/see your take on the prompt. Here’s how you create tags.
  4. Most important of all, read and comment to your blogger friends (old and new found, we’ll never know).😉
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44 thoughts on “To the man I once sang “If You’re Not the One”: A Personal Letter

  1. *Let’s all just sigh at how honest and raw these words are.*

    Awe, Rosemarie, you are wise beyond your years. These words could not be more truer. To love someone is not always easy. Oh, I know! But, I count myself blessed that my love life is never boring. 😉

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Oh dear my heart breaks with every word I read but I can’t stop myself from reading more. This is raw and honest and painful but I think it also holds the beginning of healing. Thank you for sharing your heart with us, Rosema ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  3. oh my heart breaks for you. I’ve been here before. I had to walk away from someone I had loved because the situation was untenable. Even if he was the one, (I’ll never know if he was), we just couldn’t be together. It was impossible. It broke my heart to walk away but I had to reclaim my life. It takes a strong woman to write a post saying goodbye a nd letting it go, but even though it hurts now, you’re already stronger and better off. I was. I just didn’t see it for a long while. I know you’ll get through this and I’m here for you! I might on the other side of the globe, but my thoughts and prayers are with you. Sally forth!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. oh my dear Mel. ❤ ❤ ❤ Thank you. Thank you for sharing. Indeed walking away is the hardest thing to do. It was a tough call. But my comfort comes from thinking that this will be worth it.
      Thank you. Thank you! ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Poor girl it’s difficult I know. I have experience with this as well. Sometimes we move on, we must. Better lies ahead single or with someone new. So happy you are getting past this. In your piece and other writing!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Very real and raw, from the depths of your heart–I feel sad, don’t know what to say really. LOVE is such a mystery, so hard to understand what it is and isn’t–how much is “feelings”, how much is decisions of the heart’s mind or mind’s heart….I’m rambling, and sending you my sister heart love ❤ ❤ ❤

    Liked by 1 person

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