You have
dangerous eyes.
They trapped me willingly,
like a lunatic lost in love
and lies.
Close it
so I’ll see light.
I don’t need rescuing,
my mind can regain its own wit
and fight.
Alone
I will be fine.
Like a new butterfly flying
I’ll flourish, exist on my own,
all mine.
—
Photo credit: Unsplash
In response to OctPoWriMo 2016 by Morgan Dragonwillow‘s Day 22.
—
The Deten has a unique rhyme scheme. It was created by Johnn Schroeder and can be found at Poetry Base.
The Deten is:
- a 15 line poem made up of 3 cinquains.
- meter at the discretion of the poet. Iambic pentameter is suggested, but tetrameter or sprung rhythm would also work. It might interesting to use the Crapsey Cinquain syllabic frame 2-4-6-8-2.
- rhymed abcab decde fgcfg.
Wow. 💕 💕 💕
LikeLiked by 1 person
awwww. too much, love!! ❤ ❤ ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
I love it…except I don’t understand “Close it”…it’s unclear to me what is being requested to close.
LikeLiked by 1 person
the eyes dear. 🙂 maybe i should use “close them” though it will destroy the rhyming. haha.
LikeLike
Ohhhh 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
😀
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh this is beautiful, Rosema! I love the photo of the butterfly, too, but your poem is wonderful! 🙂
Have a blessed weekend. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
awwww. thank you my dear Suz! ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤
Have a blessed weekend too my friend! ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Rosema. 🙂 Have a wonderful week!
LikeLiked by 1 person
you’re welcome! have a blessed week! ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
I hope that you have a blessed week, too. ❤
LikeLike
Excellent Poem Rosema. The Deten is another form I am not aware of so thank you for introducing me to it 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
oooh. Deten said it was not meeting you Davy! 😉
Thank you!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Great poem. I am unfamiliar with the Deten. I’ll have to attempt one today!
LikeLike
Beautiful at the end, her being all herself. He no longer has say or any control. She is herself alone.
LikeLiked by 1 person
says. we can break free. always. ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Well, this poem is flawless and wonderful. I’m drawn to every word. The verse is brave and beautiful. So well-done, sister! (I hope you got my e-mail address, which I posted below your request–hey, here it is again, clcouch17055@gmail.com. Now I won’t worry about it. This poem is so good, sister.)
LikeLiked by 1 person
Got the email, brother! I’ll be sending you something soon! 😉
And geeez…. thank you! 😀
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh I love the butterfly references. You take a fragile creature are imbue it with such strength.
LikeLiked by 1 person
oooh. such a poetic comment dear. thank youuu! 😀
LikeLiked by 1 person
You’re welcome. 😉 your poem earned it
LikeLiked by 1 person
aawww. ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Beautiful!
LikeLiked by 1 person
so my wordpress requires me to approve your comments. Argh. -_- Why WP?
Nonetheless, thank you dear! ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh no WP is acting up again, huh? 😦
LikeLiked by 1 person
yeaaaah. geez.
LikeLiked by 1 person
POWERFUL PUNCH!! 😀 Way to go dearie!! #girlpower
LikeLiked by 1 person
yeaaaah! 😀 😀 😀 thank you dearie! 😀
LikeLike