Grave: A Ghazal
©2016 Rosemawrites@A Reading Writer
Smelling the earth’s mist as spring bloom comes,
reminds me of your scent–please be back.
List’ning to the songs you sang for me,
replays your husky voice–please be back.
Re-reading the poems you’ve penned for me,
recalls your heartfelt words–please be back.
Embracing the ceaseless ache inside me,
rewinds that fateful day—please be back.
Sitting on top of your mute green bed,
reminds it’s too late to say—please be back.
—
Photo credit: Larry Chen
In response to Blogging from A to Z Challenge: G is for Ghazal
- metric at the discretion of the poet. All lines should be of equal length and meter.
- made up of 5 to 15 shers. The sher is the couplet of the traditional ghazal when it includes a “main rhyme” (qaafiyaa) established somewhere in the 2nd half of L1 of the opening sher (matla), and is repeated in L2 immediately before the refrain (radif), which is the last word or phrase of L2. This main rhyme and refrain is repeated in L2 of ALL subsequent shers in the ghazal.
- written with the opening sher (matla) establishing the tone, main rhyme (qaafiyaa) and refrain (radif).
a = main rhyme; R = refrainxxxxxx a xx R
xxxxxx a xx R - Subsequent shers (maqta) carry the main rhyme and refrain in the 2nd line. L1 of all subsequent shers has no restrictions other than to be the same length or meter as L2.
xxxxxxxxxx
xxxxxxa xx Rxxxxxxxxxx
xxxxxxaxx R
—
I hope someday to sing you a ghazal from one of the top ghazal maestros of India. 🙂 oh and I did my first doha. You inspired me. 🙂 and on your ghazal is beautiful.
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Ohhhhh! I heard your voice already and it is mystifying! I would love to hear a ghazal sang by you in person! 🙂
Thank you, Nandita! Isn’t it too sad? 😀
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Yes, ghazals are sad but very beautiful. Just like any good sad poetry. 🙂
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Oh I agree. 🙂
Thank you, Nandita!
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You are always welcome , my dearest girl 🙂
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❤ ❤ ❤
will read your poems soon. Work's been soo… -_-
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I find it interesting that so many poetic forms from the East are now suddenly making their way into the West, or at least, into English. Not sure what I think about it all, but am pleased all the same.
I feel about these forms borrowed from other languages the same way I feel about Starbucks’ use of our classic Indian chai. Starbucks’ chai is not the same as true chai, but they’re still very nice, or at least, carry some flavour. The true flavour with these poems, of course, in the original languages where these forms originated. The haiku comes to mind, as well. I cringe when I write haiku, because I KNOW they’re not the same as Japanese haiku, and yet …
Sorry for rambling. Well-done, Rosema, as always! Enjoyed your poem’s form and flavour! 🙂
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Haha! Thank you, Vijaya! I will gladly read your ramblings because they are informative and they make a lot of sense! 😀 😀 😀
I think East’s culture is slowly conquering West? 🙂
Thank you!
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🙂
You’re welcome!
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❤❤❤
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Oh wowza (said in a hush)–this is so beautiful, and sad. I hope it’s not your true experience–but if so, I send hug-filled prayers.
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Thank you for the hushed wowza, Azul. 🙂 This is entirely fictional. 🙂 But still, I got that hug-filled prayers. ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤
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Oh good–hug-filled prayers are always beneficial! I’m so glad your post was fictional 🙂
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yeah!!! 😀 😀 😀 thank you!
Love the rhyming comment Azul! ❤ 😀
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Oh gosh, I didn’t even realize–must be half-asleep over here, haha! Maybe I need cake to wake up 🙂
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hahhahah! cake is a great waking up food! 😀
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I think I’ve mentioned that my eating habits are deplorable, haha!!
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hahaha! no worries. Mine too! 😀
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Like now–it’s 2 am, and I’m thinking I should eat dinner!
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I have the same thoughts sometimes! HAHAHA
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a lovely Ghazal, Rosema, please be back! 🙂
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thank you, Lady! will drop by to you soon! please be back! 😀
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Awwwq 😥
Dear , please be back by other means …
So lovely poem, and can sense, how much ‘pain’ is sepration
@dixita011 from
Cafenined words
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thank you dear Dixita. 🙂 Yes, memories remain that’s why pain remains too.
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And Make that pain, your strength.
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oh yes dear! I agree! 😀
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Ouch 😦 That’s heartbreaking. Beautifully penned but sad.
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oh sorry my dearest. My vicious-writer-self is in action with this poem.
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Beautiful poem!
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Thank you dear! ❤
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another new form! That makes two today! You are on a roll. This poem aches with longing.
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yes dear. two for today. 😀 (though my a-z poems have been written last February and I just schedule them for the week. :D)
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wow you are ahead of the game. I am just trying to keep up…
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and yes! i am glad the longing was felt. 🙂 thank you dear!
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you are keeping up gloriously dear Mel! 😀
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Trying to! 🙂
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😀 😀 😀 😀
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Heartbreaking but a beautiful ghazal… Loved it ❤
Cheers,
Srivi – AtoZChallenge
G for Graveyard | Twitter
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Thank you Srivi! 🙂
It’s interesting that we almost have the same title. 😀
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yeah 😀
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😀 😀 😀
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I like this form of poetry. the repetition seems to make it more poignant. Well done Rose 🙂
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Thank you, Judy! 🙂 The form is quite a challenge and I am glad you liked my first try. 🙂
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you are really good at all forms. Rose! 🙂
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oh. you are so sweet! ❤
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Thank you 🙂
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thank YOU! ❤
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I struggle with the complexities of poetic rhyming schemes and meters. So seeing your explanations of the different forms is enlightening. Thank you.
@fparkerswords
Frank Parker’s Author Site
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Glad the explanations I included helped you to know more about them. 🙂
Thank you for the visit, Frank!
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What a beautiful and touching poem! I love the format and repetition.
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thank you, Fida! 🙂 I am always glad to see my poems read by writers i haven’t known yet! so it is great meeting you (virtually!). 🙂
And thank you for your generous kind words! 🙂
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A beautiful, bittersweet poem!
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yes dear PJ! Thank you for capturing it well, bitter sweet. ❤
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An adorable Ghazal from the beautiful Princess! 😀 ❤
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awww. thank you sweet Queen Dajena! ❤
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same pinchhhh…beutifully written.
if am not wrong opening couplet also has to rhyme 😉
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hi there! i believe we have the same form for G and yes, you are right. I missed the rhyming.
thank you!
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So lovely, like yourself, my sweet friend. 💕
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oh dear Annie! Thank you for seeing that this is still lovely aid its dark content. 🙂 Thank you!
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There’s powerfully evocative phrasing here: “. . . Smelling the earth’s mist . . . replays your husky voice . . . Embracing the ceaseless ache . . .” And more. Certainly, this is its own song.
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oh thank you for taking note of those phrases. 🙂 I am trying so hard to ‘show’ and not ‘tell’. 🙂 I hope I achieved that. 🙂 ❤
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Yes, showing more than telling. That’s what you’re accomplishing.
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Love the rhyming comment, Christopher! Thank you very much!
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