Second Ride

Posted on by areadingwriter

NOTE: This is the second part of my short fiction Ride, published last Friday.

Wait!

Can I get your name?

This is what I wanted him to say, but, it didn’t happen. I fell asleep along the ride and when I woke up, he’s gone.

I was honestly hoping to see him again but I didn’t, until it was a Monday morning again.

I was slowly making my way inside the jampacked bus when I saw a familiar hair, black-yet-almost-brown, properly combed, irresistibly neat.

As I saw his wide yet wrinkle-free forehead, his bushy yet so masculine brows, his dark and long eyelashes covering his gorgeous eyes, I was sure, it was him.

My heart kept beating fast, excited to know if our story will have its part two.

He was actually sleeping, but he might wake up and see me still, right?

Until…

I saw the girl beside him.

Maybe a year younger than me, with curly dark brown hair, pointed nose, long lashes, perfect brows and lovely lips.

She was also asleep…

and…

her head was on his shoulder.

I stopped in a corner opposite them and looked away.

Disappointed, I was not able to stop asking myself…

Is this the end of our story?

—

©2015 Rosemawrites@A Reading Writer. All Rights Reserved.

Photo credit: Favim

Thank you for the four votes for a second part, Mandi, Christopher, Jacq and of course my ever consistent fiction-fan, Fun!

Thank you for the suggestion as well, Belinda!

~

Published by areadingwriter

I read because I write. | I write because I read.

45 thoughts on “Second Ride”

  3. Good continuation. I think you should have a part three. I think the girl on the guys shoulder is his sister or cousin or bestfriend. When he wakes up he’s like ‘Why are you sleeping on me!’ And then he notices your character in the corner and he’s like hey, I was going to call you. This isn’t what it looks like etc… Just what I think. Great writing

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Haha! 😀 You almost finished the story, Mandi! 😀 I think those are interesting possibilities. 🙂
      And… yes, I am writing a third and last part. I haven’t decided want to do with these two but I am surely writing an ending. 🙂

      Thank you, so much, Mandi!

      Liked by 1 person

  4. As a reader (and as me), I like this part because the mood goes up and down, realistically. Who is she? What will happen in the narrative, as it goes on in verse or simply in life (imagined or real). I mean, I’d vote for going on. But each part on its own has insight on its own. Thank you!

    The Victorians, by the way, would like the man. High foreheads (wrinkle-free) with lots of hair atop were highly desirable.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you! I am truly glad that you liked it, no matter how shallow this is compared to your timely pieces. 🙂 I really appreciate how appreciative you are with my work. (And yes, believe me, I adore your work more because of their realistic weight and relevant importance.)

      Nonetheless, I think I’ll be writing the third and last part anytime, soon! 😀 I am still deciding what to do with this two! (You know endings are the hardest part, right? :D)

      Thank you for that Victorian trivia! I didn’t know that!HAHA

      Thanks again, Christopher!

      Like

  10. Wow! You leave me wondering… is this the end for her…or maybe she’d mistaken as it could be his sister/cousin or someone unknown who had fallen asleep on his shoulder… or someone who like him (as in one-sided love) … There are just so many possibilities… Oh! I can’t wait to read the finale. 😄 You are great at creating suspense, Rosema. 😄 Good works! ❤️❤️❤️

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